Proverbs 16—Man Makes Plans, and the Lord Establishes Steps

My first wife, Kim, and I made some general retirement plans. They were not fully developed, but we had some general ideas of what was coming. Timing was flexible, but we had a window of time identified.

After her passing, I realized all my plans were now no longer applicable. I could not even make new plans with any certainty. Plans are based on some assumptions. Assumptions are, by definition, not dependable.

Making plans is not wrong, but we need to recognize that we can only plan.

The Lord establishes the actual steps we take.

“The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.” Proverbs 16:9

We are warned against boasting of our tomorrows. Loss helps you understand that concept very clearly. I mourned an altered future when I lost my wife. So many plans were changed in that moment of loss.

It’s comforting to know that there are steps to be taken that no tragedy can change. Those steps are established by the Lord. In the wake of loss, you should rest on the promise and declaration of this verse. The Lord establishes steps; they are immovable.

“In the light of a king’s face there is life, and his favor is like the clouds that bring the spring rain.” Proverbs 16:15

There have been several times in my life when a plan I had made never worked out. I look back and the altered steps were wiser or better. As a future missionary, I was heading to Angola. Plans were made. After my missionary career, I never made it to Angola. I made my plans, but he established my steps.

Here’s a question to consider: Is it better to know your plans or to know the one who guides your steps? Is it better to look at a well-planned route or into the face of the driver? There is life in the face of our king. His favor is comparable to clouds that bless the earth with spring rain.

On a long and difficult journey, the face of our Savior is to be desired more than good plans.

“How much better to get wisdom than gold! To get understanding is to be chosen rather than silver.” Proverbs 16:16

Established steps trump well-developed plans. Wisdom is better than gold. Understanding is a better choice than silver. The face of the king delivers life and is better than any good plan.

“There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.” Proverbs 16:25

Steps verses plans. Wisdom verses gold. Understanding verses silver. It’s even more important a choice than at first glance. Gold and silver are only the beginning. Turns out it’s a choice between life and death. The path or plan you make may end in death. It may seem so right. However, it’s end is the way of death.

Steps guided by the Lord, wisdom, and understanding are more important than our success in our own plans.

“Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.” Proverbs 16:32

Anger is one of the steps in the grief cycle. The summary of the grief stages is represented by denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages are generalities, and every grief journey is unique.

Slowness to anger is possible. James 1:19 cautions, “…let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger…” Solomon says the one who “…is slow to anger is better than the mighty…”

My advice is to feel the pain and rule your spirit. Manage the anger. Anger is a stage but is not inevitable. However, I learned there are some acceptable and good reasons for anger. Loss is a result of brokenness. It’s appropriate to be angry at the broken state of the world, sin, and injustice.

Loss changes plans. It takes faith to embrace the established steps of the Lord. It takes wisdom to gaze at the light of the king and choose him over gold and silver. Faith can walk you carefully through anger birthed in grief. Choose to rule your spirit on this difficult journey through grief and trust the established steps of the Lord.